Stoicism for a Better Life – Weekly exercise (January 19, 2020)

Hello there,

Two weeks ago, on Episode 8 of my Podcast series Stoicism for a Better Life, I made a logical case that judging others is not only a waste of our precious time but also that judging others does not help us become better human beings. So best to focus on our own journey and self-improvement. But this week, in true Stoic fashion, I would like to point out that there is another side to this argument if we use our rational minds to modify the parameters a little bit. Here’s an excerpt from Epictetus Discourses IV 4 7:

“At the same time I observe other people’s words and actions – not maliciously, in order to judge or ridicule them, but to better assess whether I engage in any of the same behaviour.”  

You’ll recall from my article on self-deprivation not being virtuous, that virtue is not found in what we do. Instead, virtue is found in the intentions and effort to attain a goal. So in the case of self-deprivation, like taking cold showers, the act in itself is not virtuous. However, if one does it as a conscious decision to specifically strengthen their capacity to ignore the discomforts of the body and keep ruling with the rational mind, then it is a virtuous act. It is done with the specific intent to strengthen the rational mind in one’s inner dialogue. The idea, of course, is that by strengthening the rational mind and giving it a louder voice in the inner dialogue, one is more likely to be able to do the right thing when the body is distressed (say feeling angry).

So if we can change our perspective of observing others’ wrong actions to a specific intent of improving our own actions, then we would be virtuous in our observations. Granted, pointing out someone’s wrongdoing is not exactly judging them, as judgment comes with a level of belittelment…but you get the idea.

Next time you catch yourself judging others, by all means, stop it… we know by now that this is wrong. But you can also try and get a positive out of your negative action. So use your rational mind to identify what they did wrong, and try and remind yourself (preferably when you reflect in your journal) of how you would prefer to act if confronted with a similar situation. In this way, you are turning a negative event (you being judgy) into a learning experience to better yourself (thus being virtuous).

As always, I wish you a wise, tranquil and productive week. 

Anderson Silver

(Author of “Your User’s Manual” and “Vol 2: Your Duality Within”)